come, stay and let's talk. it's a good day to be alive
Thank you, for allowing me to see this day light, a stream of crystals glistening the atmosphere that I breath in.
That you, for allowing me to memorize the sound of the wind swooshing like an ocean wave crashing into the bank of sand.
Thank you, for this tantalizing droplet of water, respite of the spirit and body, as it quenches the unresting soul in the heart.
5.13.2020
Please, let me be stronger.
Please allow me to lift this cross.
Please inspire me to make an effective decision.
I made a promise. That I’ll be there.
Please grant me strength to endure those thousands of needles, darkness, and coldness. I need to be there.
5.12.2020
Would you throw the dice?
Knowing that one thousand years of anguish awaits in one of the six windows, would you still throw the dice?
Or would you rather lay down the dice, sip on the hot warm tea wrapped around your fingers and warming your teeth and your chest?
What would you throw?
Given that five women are weeping in two of the corners, five men are marching from three sides?
What is the declines chance?
Focus. Only focus shall get you out.
5.8.2020
It’s time. It’s always been here, and it’s been waiting a long time.
You’ve done a good job holding on.
Nobody’s noticed you; neither congratulate you nor reward you.
Please remember to find the little things to be thankful for.
5.8.2020
Have you ever really felt you deserved to be alive?
Have you ever weighed the lives of those who withered
Against the hours you’ve spent watching YouTube?
Against the years you’ll be waiting for your ‘real life’ to happen?
Have you?
5.5.2020
It’s a perverted yet irresistible habit: pulling the root of your own beard hair out from the hypodermic layer with pinched nails.
I dare you do it now. Just one tiny little beard hair. Do it. Just do it.
See? It ain’t too bad doesn’t it? It hurts a little but doesn’t it feel a bit cathartic?
Have you caught yourself yet reaching for another thread of hair? A scandalous thing that others will find out if you do it too much
But you know you want it. Just do it. Do it!
5.4.2020
It’s the gut wrenching feeling that gloomingly sits inside the top part of the heart that croaks:
“But I’ve what it takes. No one understands yet. You wait and see”
It’s a miasma that pulls your thigh, your lower back, your neck, into a tiny rectangular box:
“This is my magical being. It shall do all the things that no one will know about”
It’s the jaw muscles clenched together, wouldn’t let go of the teeth in between its bones:
“I won’t end like this. I will get somewhere. Surely there’s a better place”
Ah, but may I ask: what’s the point of it all? What’s the point of the glory and the warm and the victory?
For there shall be a downfall that lurks behind your back, a bubbly days after the dark night.
But keep on at it. Keep on.
5.3.2020
Perhaps it’s ephemeral whim that made white fluffy cherry blossoms so quintessentially
Beautiful
Perhaps its ephemeral whim has made one’s heart bleed as white petals rubs on skin like shreds of sand papers
Painfully
Perhaps all it takes to distinguish the two is to
Observe.
Obverse it as it is.
5.2.2020
Deep, deep into the ocean, as you swim, digging yourself further,
You may hold your breath, pushing yourself, counting each new seconds
But perhaps, it might you’d need to set a measuring stick, an invisible one made of crystal
That never changes no matter how strong the wave hits, no matter what animal swims by
So that your lungs will continue to grow before you even know about it.
Perhaps that’s where all the jewelries lie.
5.1.2020
Surfing on the waves of mists, riding the torrents of rumbling sky, jumbles lives of humbling raindrops
Whispers in the wind, stories and tales of those time far beyond the horizon that burned so many times and so far away
3.29.2020
Ralph with Coffee 
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