Ralph with Coffee

I wanted to ask you

What you would do if you knew

Your life will end one day.

There’s no more “need” or “should”

There just is.

I want to meet and dance with someone

Who is has a passionate heart,

A daring soul, a partner-in-crime.

If I could dance this life with her,

I’d be content.

I want to stand on my two feet

And know I have done what is right.

I want to pay attention to the quiet moments

When the wind blows by in the quiet mid afternoon under the shadows of lush leaves

There is more to what appears on the surface.

I want to play with my creation

And know that it was fun for everyone.

I want the song to last

and fill the cup not to full, nor too dry

So that when we are all together

We would cherish all we’ve had.

5.20.2026

That moment

When the wind was blowing

And we didn’t see what was in front of us

Except for our hands

Holding onto each other

We couldn’t know what was real

And what was not.

But we just walked forward

Believing that we will get there.

I know where I want to go now.

It’s the moment we walked together.

It’s the one when we were carefree

Because we had covered our bases.

I know there can always be a disappointment

But I am going forward anyways

Because I really believe in us

And the days to come.

I know it’s silly

But I now believe in myself.

It may be slow

But come join me

Let’s walk this walk together.

5.16.2026

I just bursted out loud laughing in the gym. 
Maybe it’s because my grip just slipped
trying a heavier weight on lat pull down
on my last set of twelve reps,
maybe it’s because I just survived
a set of barbell squat with all my might
on a weight less than half of that in my peak time. 
or maybe it’s the voice of Beyoncé 
ringing like the crystal halo in my AirPods. 

Whatever it is, 
all at once, it all came crashing down. 
The joy, oh how so glorious and light it is!
Everything, the air, the weight, the people, fell into its places, like puzzle pieces coming together. 

I wish to share this light with you. 
Because I know what it felt like to be there. 
I hope this will come across to you. 


5.11.2026

Keep the will
to continue the fight. 
Remember what you fought for. 

those who fought with you
still remain in your heart. 

Remember them. 
Carry on their will
and get to the destination. 

5.4.2026

You would have said, “come on, do it again —
forget about them, remember what matters”

I remember the scratch on the skin,
the scrapbook full of cutout pictures, and the pens. 

a heavy metal music played from earphones. 
A fragment of sun light glistened on your sclera. 
Everything else was just a noise. 

quietly, tenuously, you scribbled. 
Against a wall after a wall —- you carried on. 
A flower blossomed in the crack of the wall. 

The rain, coffee, book, movie, and violin. The heavy silence. I remember them. I remember what they stood for. 

I will carry them on. 

5.1.2026

It was two, no, three storied yellow ltownhouse.
Squeaky wooden stairs led to a purple room. 
I remember the red couch, the glass vinyl player
and a vase of flowers by the window. 
On a coffee table sat an ash tray filled with cigarette butts. 
A fishnet hammock between chestnut trees
also had a cigarette burn. 
A cardboard-made octopus sat by the street
as the song by the Radiohead creaked from a stereo. 
A hawk sat on top of a pole, tearing up a rabbit,
as neighbors gathered over a garage sale 
where I found a Dostoyevsky book
and a letter between two lovers
slid in between the pages. 
A hookah bar hid a couple blocks down the street,
not to far from the quiet church
whose stain-glass glowed by the moonlight. 
The burning scent of oil paint fumes,
the sole piano on the hallway,
and burning heat through a white coffee cup
all mingling into one night. 
The closed eyes,
soft whispers of breathing 
and eternally peaceful fraction of a moment. 

4.29.2026