Sky

it’s a lonely world
when you are the one
believing the sky is blue
when everyone else
says it is red.
maybe they are from the West,
where their mountain
feeds fire into the sky,
but I believe the sky is blue.
I am sitting in this chair
imagining and lamenting,
but I forgot to look up at the sky.
now, you see,
it is grey.
will it be blue?
will it be red?
will it always be grey?
who knows.
let us eat our meal first.

5.3.2023

Raison

I wonder if I unleashed Pandora for myself.
boredom of living in a small town is real.
I’ve endured strikes of lightening bolts
withstood the weight of the ocean
and bled thousands of cuts by the others.
through it all, I brew one soul, one heart.
yet I wonder, what is the meaning of all this?
why go through such inglorious, tedious path?
perhaps, it is the path that I must take.
raison d’être. c’est toute.

5.1.2023

Cloud candy

I smoked a cigarettes for the first time
in almost 10 years
in my dream.
it felt so real
I had to remember
the dryness in my mouth
is not the nicotine tar
but unwashed icecream from night before.
let us not let our guard down
to the “one-offs”
let us stay awake
and walk up this hill
towards the threshold
where all efforts will prevail.

4.30.2023

Space

I had a friend once.
we had a good time.
it was nothing special.
we’d share a snack,
talk about funny event,
and share the same space.
it was a good time.
the more I try to hide my longing for it,
stronger, and deeper it spreads its roots
Until it becomes a transient sentiment
in a vacuum of numbed senses.
I remember,
but sometimes I wonder
if it holds me back.

4.29.2023