come, stay and let's talk. it's a good day to be alive
If you have tasted the pain in its entirety,
you’ll know the meaning of its word.
For those who have not drank from the cup,
only emptiness will ring the air.
Let us offer kindness if we know its meaning.
Let us strive to share the burden.
Let us strive for the togetherness.
8.1.2025
it hurts.
it’s like a star exploded in a pitch dark sky
and blinded my eyes
that were used to the darkness
that felt like an eternity.
even though I pushed away this relationship
because I felt it was the right thing to do
deep inside, I wanted it.
I wanted sorely.
how many more shots of pain can I endure?
how many more rejection of love will come?
will this all be worthwhile in the end?
will I be forgiven for what I have done?
will I ever be loved?
it’s a long dark night.
9.28.2023
thank you for stopping by
your scent has been wonderful
I even dreamed the past days of passion
where I thought I was truly alive
or perhaps it was the only time I was truly alive
hahahahaha
what does it matter?
I live my own life.
if you come, come.
if you want to go, go.
I will live my life at my own measure of best effort
I will push my own boundaries of limits
and keep striving to become better than yesterday
I will pay the cost, I will live my life.
good luck.
9.16.2022
mind is in a blurry white mist
time passes slowly but a day goes by fast
as if a cold sandbag’s on my head and freezes
train of thoughts, perhaps it’s Tylenol that has
thankfully quenched the fire of white knots
perhaps it’s the lack of sleep from last night
I can’t tell; since I lost sense of smell
what feelings I had day-to-day
except for this salty mucus with hint of sadness
I suppose I should continue to work
for nothing else seems to give me relief
4.13.2022
some describe it white fire
others, hot knife
it’ll makes you alert for awhile
but try to dodge and not fight
soon it’ll make you cry
out of misery and inescapability
if you can, avoid prolonged exposure
it may take your sleep, your thoughts, and your will.
so don’t be stubborn
just get the Tylenol
4.12.2022
feeling numb in a plastic bubble
staring out into the world
one pinched the wall
peeling away the shield
rushed in were emotions:
love, passion, and freedom;
city lights and the aurora;
magic filled the air
as one held reins to affair
but also came in fatigue and pain
from battles cries and sacrifices of attrition
beauties missed and promises broken
daggers in heart, tears in shadows
sweat soaked neck, dried blood on hand
but all in all,
one lived
and one died many times.
had one not jumped,
one would not have known.
12.28.2021
I stopped smoking five years ago
but it’s creeping back into my memory
iron-rust like taste of cigarette tars
lung piercing acidity
is a luring trap against this pain
started chewing on colorful starbursts
it’s saccharine strawberry lemon
that soothes acrid pulses of this pain
but it’s a cookie trail to a slow diabetes
staring out the window of fall sky,
I wonder when this pain will be over.
11.3.2021
when staring at the mirror,
try not to avert your eyes
from the eyes that implore you.
be honest.
speak the words that are
as real as the pain of living each day
there are just too many fools
who are drunk on easiness & cheapness
of empty words
but words that are as real as the pain
will remember you.
11.1.2021
Ralph with Coffee 