mysteriously,
it’s not about how smart you are.
it’s about how long you can hold on
in spite of all the shit being thrown at you.
having low expectations,
and having high hopes,
one day at a time
we make a progress
no one has dreamed of.
10.20.2023
Tag: time
Possible
in silence, I often forgot
to remember
I can still grow.
I can be better than yesterday.
I can be wiser, more resilient,
and be more humane.
I can use these new capacities
to teach, to amend, and to improve.
in repetition, we don’t stay still.
we either regress or progress.
I choose to progress
while holding onto my virtues.
I hope to continue to grow
and be in harmony with all.
10.19.2023
Facade
when I was a teenager,
I thought I’d be mightier when I get older.
Now I see the macho facade was
something those adults desperately needed
just to keep up with
what’s being demanded of them
from the society to protect what they loved.
I see now
what I loved used to protect me as a child.
as an adult, it is my turn
to protect what I love.
Heart
a heart that has been through years
of loving, fights, and endured them all
will know when is the right time to move.
we all become a fool in front of an attraction
but a soul that has been through it all
will know what lies ahead.
I pray that I make a wise decision
and proceed with caution.
10.16.2023
Withstand
I start to see that when you endure,
all the challenges will become your strengths.
if you run away,
they will haunt you for the remaining days.
some are very scary.
some are deeply hurtful.
so remember that you are not alone.
you must seek company.
and then endure the hardship.
it may not make sense now,
but it will once you’ve overcome it.
10.12.2023
Grace
I am grateful
for the fights I can have
I may lose sometimes
and I may win sometimes
people may come and go.
but the fight remains.
it’s a way of life,
a way of growth,
and way of wisdom.
I grew to respect it,
and recognized it in others.
it’s a personal mission,
and we will carry it on.
10.11.2023
Give
like a soccer ball kicked around too much,
like a tree enduring harsh winters
like a pebble in an ocean, smoothed all over,
I stand here trying to get up again.
I squeezed my heart and let out a roar
yet expectations of my beloved don’t budge.
I am jumping over the mountains
and be sturdy as a lightening rod,
yet torrents of disappointments won’t stop.
I am sensing the light within me flickering
yet not know what to do.
I hold onto the mast as I hope for enlightenment.
10.10.2023
Keep
even after you’ve done your best
odds may not favor you.
there are those you can control
and those you must admit you cannot control
even as the inevitable befalls onto you,
squirm.
keep squirming. keep your vision. keep rising again.
even if the world falls upon you
even if this may be the end
you’ll know you have done your best.
keep squirming.
inevitably, the odds may favor you one day.
10.8.2023
Best
somehow
when I raised my head
and saw the time
5 hours had passed by.
I looked down again,
and went back into the fray.
it’s chaotic, but it’s a good work.
I’ve put in my best,
and at times I have lost,
but I am not regretful of it.
I am glad I put in my best
and tomorrow, I will do it again.
10.7.2023
Love
do I deserve to be loved?
I realized things have changed
and that I am not in mud any more.
but the memory of the dark water
lingers too close in my mind.
do I deserve to be loved?
can I ask to be loved?
can I be free to love?
to find out,
I’ll be a bit more honest,
I’ll work hard,
but not to earn the love,
but to protect those that I love.
9.27.2023
Ralph with Coffee 
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