grant me the strength to overcome my dues.
grant me the wisdoms to find solution.
grant me humbleness to be humane.
grant me the courage to start a change.
grant me ability to protect my beloved.
6.5.2022
Koi Fish
I’ve heard there’s no limit to koi fish to grow.
But caged in a small glass bowl
looking out into the world,
I’ve heard it does not fathom ever growing larger
than the size of a bowl
I wonder how I can scoop one out of the bowl
and let it grow in the river
so that it can grow, swim free as it wishes,
and rise to its calling,
to become a dragon.
6.4.2022
Philosophical Question
Dear readers, I have a philosophical question:
if you close your eyes, reflect on your life
and find my joyous and glorious days you lived,
would you say you are satisfied with the life you’ve had so far?
would you even go so far as to say, “my life is enough?”
But at the same time, if you open your eyes each morning, wake up and face another day, another blank page in addition to your life,
and choose to live and paint it,
are you essentially saying, “I am not satisfied with the life I’ve had so far, let me see what I can do to improve my life” or “what does life have to reveal to me?”
Can these two school of thoughts coexist?
I am not arguing for an early end of life or stating what people should do.
This is just an exploration of different perspective people may have. This is an exploration of mind.
What I am essentially asking is, how do you balance between saying “I am enough” and “I want to grow”? For growth appears to be associated with happiness, but so does satisfaction. Yet, growth and satisfaction seem to be unable to coexist.
What are your thoughts? I’d kindly appreciate any response.
6.4.2022
Hope
Allow me to keep my faithfulness,
allow me to hold onto principles,
allow me to share warmth with others,
allow me to build a refuge for those in need,
allow me to discern virtue from vice
allow me to remember my humble origin
allow me to share a moment with others.
6.3.2022
Wish
wherever you are, I wish you love.
smile when you want to smile,
run freely when you want to run.
I wish you peace in mind and heart.
I hope there is a shade of tree leaves
to release you from unforgiving heat.
wherever you are, I wish you love.
6.2.2022
Mood
Slow dancing in rain next to a dumpster fire
A lit cigarette between lips, submerged in bathtub water with black suit & tie, singing ‘over the rainbow’
Praying in front of a concrete cross in a cemetery
Worthwhile
sometimes I wonder
whether it was worthwhile to have done it all
when, in the end, all you come to
is the starting point all over again
but you’ve gone through point of no return
you’ve vowed to avenge your youth
you’ve been bruised, bled, and bloodied
by thousands of cuts by those passing by
when, at the point of arrival, you realize
you’ve arrived at the opposite direction
of where everyone needed you to be
where you have cried your soul into black instead
I wonder if all those were worthwhile after all
6.1.2022
Mystery
I swear I was awake all the time
but before I knew what was going on,
I felt a warm and cozy feeling in my chest
the warmth glowed like a firefly
faithfully staying alight as the dusk falls
I stretched my hand to grasp it
but it slipped through my fingers
dissolving into its respite, the darkness
silence filled the night
as I waited.
5.31.2022
Moving 2
like a delay before a good sneeze,
you know it is coming, until it’s in front of your nose;
and then, bam!
the deadline is here.
everything must change, the lights, the shapes,
the forms, the texture, the air, the color,
the warmth, the coolness, the wetness,
the hardness, the mythic enchantedness,
everything, everything must change;
and along with it, part of you must go too!
be careful; otherwise you might lose something precious.
witness.
remember.
then move on.
5.22.2022
Moving
I sense electrifying anxiousness
as I wait for the day to move out of my apartment
morning rituals, golden sunsets, night sceneries,
as if an invisible switch had turned,
will all be far out of reach
to live in a space is to build a life
to uproot what you had
it is rather heartbreaking
maybe there is a proper way to say goodbye
I just hope I can move on fine
and remember all the memories
5.21.2022
Ralph with Coffee 
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