liquid nitrogen can burn
nitrogen glycerine can burst
we could’ve been breathable air
but no, our dreams must be shared
as we drink our bitter sour black liquid
thrusting ourselves against the limit
1.30.2022
Tag: dream
Bookstore
by happenchance, I opened the door,
opened, too, a world I haven’t seen before,
a father, crouched down, reading a book
a mother, calling their son to take a look
this bookstore, a microcosm of eclectic stories
fireworks of intellects, memories, and histories,
world unknown, unseeable, unimaginable to the rest,
perhaps best kept hidden inside, as a place blessed
let its glories be passed onto this child
let it sow seeds of dreams to keep him smile
1.8.2022
Joy
followed a white bunny down a hole
came out into world unknown at all
wallowed around to find respite
hollowed candle I found at night
running in dark worried through an arc
brushing doubts aside reminiscing the past
wondering impassive, expansive thoughts
thundering punishments, imminent fraught
ticking of clock, won’t it stop
ticking of clock, don’t you stop
1.6.2022
Headache
slowly crawls like a shadow
gnarly smell infuse the air
hoping it’ll be better tomorrow
in the end, it will all be fair
headache, you are not to be feared
I know it’s only pain that matters
better healthy and pain all over
rather than lying in bed all the years
won’t it shine like sweet bees in the air
won’t it rise like what Spring brings to here
1.5.2022
Resolution
keep your head held high
even as your fellow men blame you
keep striking that red hot iron ore
of your dream and your ambition
even if it dissipates like a sandcastle
no matter how dearly you loved that woman
who turned you down like a squashed bug
believe that there will be one who see you as you are.
no matter how many woman reject you
believe that there will be the one who accepts your hand.
no matter how foolish your actions of the past were
forgive yourself and accept yourself
learn and rise. never forget to rise again.
12.30.2021
Destiny
I am running towards you, my dear
through dry and clear
sky of Sahara desert,
through blizzards
of Northeastern
I am fighting, debating,
crying, running,
trying to get to you
as soon as possible
so please wait for me
I am coming for you
from the past to the future
against all of the odds
12.15.2021
Blind
do we stab at each other
thirsting for love?
a fresher kind of love,
the lustful look, thrill
of youth, risk, and rich?
in a city of backstabbing,
bats fly about like butterflies
in the dark night sky
luminous with luscious skyscrapers
12.4.2021
Waltz
head hurts
heart burns
eyes dried
hair reeks
one more day
one more gig
another stretch
another let-down
still,
rise, rise again
drum your beat
march head-high
rise, rise again.
11.30.2021
Light warmth
in that moment, I happened to stare up
towards the brown-bricked wall
painted in plain lemon yellow color
and the orange sunset light
all that refracted light from branches
fell on the wall, silently, and softly.
at that moment, I remembered vaguely
yes, I used to think sentimentally.
I used to smile nostalgically at the
warmth of a mother bird cooing the babies
in her nest, ever so protected from outside
word, so warm and fuzzy and soft and safe —
I almost forgot that previous version of me,
which, I think is only a thought or two away
from now, used to have overflowing feelings.
I — it was at that moment I realized — had
promised myself that I would come back.
that once all these battles incurred by
pesty intruders were finished, I’d come back.
That we would smile, feel easy with trust,
and make jokes whose smile won’t stop
once we were done with just this one job.
but then I saw my hands and they were rusty
they were the hands that tasted the prize.
they were hungry and the would not stop.
everything made sense. everything was logical. everything was justified.
my heart was hallowed with flames of justice.
my spine, thickened with battle scars.
then, alone in the park, when no one wanted
me, I stared at the bricked wall, bouncing off the warm orange sunset light with shades of
bare tree branches,
and I realized:
I used to be soft.
I used to have feelings.
I used to cry for the mother bird.
when I stop, will I ever lay my head again
to the soft songs in the warmth and beauty?
will I be forgiven?
will I know it was worth it at the end?
I walked back from the park
and the darkness fell
but that light in my eyes wouldn’t go away.
perhaps it is the beginning of everything after all.
11.15.2021
Fire potato
a potato on fire rolls down the hill,
in the darkness of night sky, it is a shooting star.
what is there to lose, when we are already losing to ever faster speed of time.
better to rock and roll, bumping into things
and cracking things open, such as your heart,
so that it will shed all the dirty residues
and shine as the purest gem.
it hurts, it’s supposed to hurt.
don’t let go of that grip of your grit
and get on with it. see things for yourself.
good things are out there.
11.13.2021
Ralph with Coffee 
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