Radiant

all became white;
(even when I blinked)
the whiteness filled the universe.
and then it was dark.
like a smile that flashed
— and then gone —
there was the universe
and then aloneness.
As this ebbed and flowed,
I held on.
I don’t know what it was.
But it’s inscribed in my bones.
touch my calluses
taste my tears
peer into my iris
and you will see —
all of it is there.

11.14.2023

Cold

when the truth is not what I want, I often morph it into a storyline I want it to be and put it over my eyes and ears. When it bit me, I said it was my sacrifice I willingly made. When it stole from me, I said I willingly gave to it. When it lied to me, I said I knew the truth already, but willingly feigned to believe the lie.
But in the end, the story never held,
and dark spots started to spread all over.
From the start to the finish nothing had changed.
so I told myself, I won’t do this again.

11.12.2023