Pendulum

wavering between love and hate
we hope to find peace in mental state
we love the world,
then hate the world,
then love it again,
then hate it once again
one moment, a convivial hippy,
next moment, a dictator revolutionary
a warm sunset turns cold dark night
the cold dark night births a yolk of sunrise
we forgive
yet we commit

3.4.2022

Resolve

I won’t know the future now,
but I hope that it will be meaningful
a prudent one, one that will be virtuous
and one that will benefit many others as well

yes, survival and flourishing matters,
but the intangible laws of the world,
the principle that I abide by
and effort that goes into pursuit of actualisation
will be there too.

not just for me, you, us, but also for our future.

2.20.2022

Hope

it’s as if every inch of breathing space is
whipped into whirlwinds of flowery fire in
this long narrow path we all must take
when light runs thousands of miles to make
this realization that, perhaps that’s all:
you’ve given it all, and now wait for your call

when darkness had lent its hand to me
I shook its hand
it was as if my bones shattered at mere touch
yet I did not let go.

there is more work to do
there will be a new day
the sun will rise again
there will be more

Bookstore

by happenchance, I opened the door,
opened, too, a world I haven’t seen before,
a father, crouched down, reading a book
a mother, calling their son to take a look

this bookstore, a microcosm of eclectic stories
fireworks of intellects, memories, and histories,
world unknown, unseeable, unimaginable to the rest,
perhaps best kept hidden inside, as a place blessed

let its glories be passed onto this child
let it sow seeds of dreams to keep him smile

1.8.2022

Joy

followed a white bunny down a hole
came out into world unknown at all
wallowed around to find respite
hollowed candle I found at night

running in dark worried through an arc
brushing doubts aside reminiscing the past
wondering impassive, expansive thoughts
thundering punishments, imminent fraught

ticking of clock, won’t it stop
ticking of clock, don’t you stop

1.6.2022

Window

in awe, I stared upward
remotely familiar memories
long-gone, but I wondered,
remembering veiled stories:

a flash of smile, a gentle touch;
popping balloons at climax,
awashed shame and such;
a lonesome requiem at flashback

in silence, I stared up high;
white, misty cloud filled the sky
calmly, I counted the dreams
reluctantly, letting tears stream.

1.1.2022

Resolution

keep your head held high
even as your fellow men blame you
keep striking that red hot iron ore
of your dream and your ambition
even if it dissipates like a sandcastle
no matter how dearly you loved that woman
who turned you down like a squashed bug
believe that there will be one who see you as you are.
no matter how many woman reject you
believe that there will be the one who accepts your hand.
no matter how foolish your actions of the past were
forgive yourself and accept yourself
learn and rise. never forget to rise again.

12.30.2021

Review – Dostoevsky’s Double

In a lazy summer of 2015, I picked up on a book in a yard sale in front of a house where I lived. It was not my house, but it was one that I loved. Feeling somewhat directionless, I picked up the book, The Double, written by Dostoevsky.

In the book, I found an old piece of paper, hand-written by two writers, strangers to each other, addressing to the other. A writer asked, should their lives be consumed by love so important, yet so ephemeral.

A note shared by two strangers wrought with passionate attraction to each other. This, all the more, made the book more interesting subject to read. Has this book by Dostoevsky been the catalyst between these individuals? Intrigued, instead of procrastinating reading this one along with the rest of the books, I made a resolution to read at least one of the novels in the book to see what drew these two strangers together.

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