Heart

a heart that has been through years
of loving, fights, and endured them all
will know when is the right time to move.
we all become a fool in front of an attraction
but a soul that has been through it all
will know what lies ahead.
I pray that I make a wise decision
and proceed with caution.

10.16.2023

Withstand

I start to see that when you endure,
all the challenges will become your strengths.
if you run away,
they will haunt you for the remaining days.
some are very scary.
some are deeply hurtful.
so remember that you are not alone.
you must seek company.
and then endure the hardship.
it may not make sense now,
but it will once you’ve overcome it.

10.12.2023

Give

like a soccer ball kicked around too much,
like a tree enduring harsh winters
like a pebble in an ocean, smoothed all over,
I stand here trying to get up again.
I squeezed my heart and let out a roar
yet expectations of my beloved don’t budge.
I am jumping over the mountains
and be sturdy as a lightening rod,
yet torrents of disappointments won’t stop.
I am sensing the light within me flickering
yet not know what to do.
I hold onto the mast as I hope for enlightenment.

10.10.2023

Keep

even after you’ve done your best
odds may not favor you.
there are those you can control
and those you must admit you cannot control
even as the inevitable befalls onto you,
squirm.
keep squirming. keep your vision. keep rising again.
even if the world falls upon you
even if this may be the end
you’ll know you have done your best.
keep squirming.
inevitably, the odds may favor you one day.

10.8.2023

Love

do I deserve to be loved?
I realized things have changed
and that I am not in mud any more.
but the memory of the dark water
lingers too close in my mind.

do I deserve to be loved?
can I ask to be loved?
can I be free to love?

to find out,
I’ll be a bit more honest,
I’ll work hard,
but not to earn the love,
but to protect those that I love.

9.27.2023

Evolution

like an amoeba staring at a bird,
like a dog running after a car,
I chase after a beaten path.

yes, I know I am ashamed
and part of my drive to ignore this shame
moves me when I am the most tired.

a sun shined once, very briefly.
and I learned in that priceless moment
that you must choose to live for yourself.

and the rest of the world will follow.

9.24.2023

Miracle

every day, I am hoping,
wishing for a miracle.
in the ocean of sand grains,
I yearn to become the one.
one that is picked up,
one who is loved,
one who knows the truth.
saved from calamities.

then I saw the sun.

ever-shining sun.
it was beautiful.
I am immersed in
its repetitive motions,
and all of its colors.
And so did a smile
on my lips
as I woke up again
in the morning.

9.23.2023